I'm a foreigner. And that's okay.

I am awful at keeping you few faithful  readers up-to-date.  And for that I'm sorry.  I keep myself pretty busy, and if I'm not busy, I'm trying to catch my breath (which unlike others, I don't do through blogging).  Truth be told, the last couple months have been a bit difficult for me.  I've officially been here over a year now, and somehow my whole being realizes it.  It's been a while since I've been on American soil, seen my family, had the comforts of a typical job in a language I fully understand, had friends my age that live in my town, understood the culture fully and embraced it (or the subcultures I could easily create for myself).    I've started projects and planned small events with a bit of success.  But generally the going can be slow. 

Change is slow.  Days go by fast.  After months of planning and working towards something, sometimes there's no visible reward.  Grant writing with our mayor's hall, for example.  I sat down for hours with a Moldovan woman, grasping her ideas for the project proposal in Romanian, translating and crafting the description into English, and at the end of the day coming up empty-handed with no approval of the project.  I don’t regret the process; I learned much about the grant-writing process with Moldovans, our small town politics, and new vocab words in Romanian.  But it's tiring after a while.  Another example is planning a girls' summer camp for our region.  After hours of planning for the event hoping to win funding, here we are in June with still no funding in site.  Unfortunately, there will be no camp this summer most likely.  Once again, I don't regret the work we've done for this project; I have learned much from my time spent with Elena, my GLOW leader, and I truly enjoy her company and all the stories she shares with me.  Much of the workshops and activities we have developed for the camp will still be used one way or another.  But after a while with me and my American ways and appetite for success, I come away a bit more run-down. 

It's not necessarily a bad thing to be humbled and realize that I can't do it all.   After a cry, it's usually always what I realize in whatever country I find myself.  I'm not invincible, I am only one person, and I will be just fine.  And I am! Even though I'm a bit off balance sometimes, I am still incredibly blessed to have a family of PCVs that have my back, Moldovan's wanting me to be happy (including strangers who see me crying on the rutiera that cause me to laugh), and support of my family and friends back home.   I am one lucky gal.  But sometimes, it doesn't make life easier.  Some days, I just really miss my sister.  I really would like to know my neighbors and not feel like the foreigner.  I'd really like to go for a run without countless stares at what a crazy girl I am.  I'd really like to fit in, but I never will.  And it's okay.  It's good.  But it doesn't make it easier. 

So all this being said, I'll choose to find comfort in the words of Winston Churchill:

“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.” 

Onto better things and positive outlooks…  My sister and brother-in-law are coming TOMORROW!!!  I am so ready for their visit.  We'll be in Moldova 5 days and then off on a grand adventure for 11 days in several of Europe's top cities.  Life ain't so bad.  It's actually quite good.  It's just necessary to step back and reflect sometimes. 

On an unrelated note, here are a few quick links that I have found or have created that maybe you would be interested in seeing:

-A link to the premier food blog in Moldova!! (brought to you by my roommate and me): http://sfeclaspice.wordpress.com/

-My new source of endless laughter, the Remi Gaillard series on YouTube.  Just keep clicking through links.

-Our (basic) bizclub website for our students. 

Enjoy!

The Month of May: Part II

Church bells ring on Memorial Easter!

The Month of May: Part I

"Among the changing months, May stands confest The sweetest and in fairest colors dressed." James Thomson, the poet, said it right.  May was a beautiful month in Moldova. Cool mornings, sunny days, warm afternoons.  Vitamin D in its natural form has once again been captured by "bronze-makers" like me that like to bask in the sun.

At the beginning of May, my computer decided to crash on me.  I had forgotten how directly related my work is to a computer.  Communication, documents, internet research, more online communication, blog entries for the few loyal readers I have…  all these tasks require a functioning laptop/internet.  I lucked out, as our IT specialist helped recover files on my broken hard drive and replace it with a new drive.  I hope it doesn't happen again!

The month of May included Easter celebrations, project work, and a lot of traveling.   I tried to document well the cultural aspects to share with you, so I'm going to post a few different entries.

Easter

Easter in Moldova is one of the country's most celebrated holidays.  People wake up on Sunday morning hours before dawn, go to the Orthodox church, stand outside of it for an hour or so, and wait until the priest comes to bless their basket of Easter goods.  Lindsey and I participated as well.  Afterwards, people go back to their families and have a small masa (eat and drink!) before going back to bed for a few hours.  Sunday Easter is supposed to be the ultimate day of rest, but the Monday following is a big celebration.  (Ours was a little bit reversed.)

Preparing our basket at 2:30 in the morning.

Baskets outside the church at 3:30 am.

 We celebrated with my host family after a few hours of sleeping.  (My host mom said to come tomorrow, and I thought she met after a good night's (or morning's) rest.  We came a day early, but of course we were still welcomed with open arms and more food than we could have ever wanted.  It's so refreshing to be able to be outside again for masas!

Memorial Easter

The weekend after Easter in Moldova is Memorial Easter, where people honor their deceased loved ones.  They go to the cemetery and make a masa at the gravesite of their loved ones.  Many people dress up for this, and many family members away from their hometown come home for this event.  I went to the north  of Moldova with my old host family from last summer.  I always enjoy spending time with them, and it's even better now when I can understand (almost) all they are saying.  In the village, we arrived on a Sunday morning and prepared food all day.  Monday morning, we took all of our celebratory foods and gifts (for the deceased and those attending) to the cemetery.  Here, we met all the aunts and uncles and family members.  We waited for an hour until the priest came by and showered the site and people with holy water.  Then we could eat to our heart's contentment the blessed food that we had prepared the day before. 

Preparing food to take to the cemetery (sarmale- well-seasoned rice (sometimes with meat) wrapped up in grape leaves or lettuce leaves and cooked)

Monday morning, Memorial Easter in the cemetery.

Gifts, food, wine, and flowers cover the gravesites.  It's also a time when people can see long-time acquaintances who no longer live in the village.

Stefan was thirsty. It was hot.

Carolina, Stefan, and Stela.  Family, even here, is irreplaceable.

The goofball uncles and the boys.

Fun uncle.

Barbecue after a few hours in the cemetery

The village house, where my host mom and her 4 siblings were raised.  Masa outdoors!

Croatia

I'm kind of a spoiled volunteer.  I do try to work hard though and because of this and a bit of good luck, I have had incredible opportunities to travel with work.  This month, I had the chance to go to Croatia for 10 days.  It was an incredible trip as always.  This year is simply one-of-a-kind for a girl from Nebraska, living in Moldova.  What brought me to Croatia was an apparent training on entrepreneurship.  I wish I could say I learned a lot, was inspired to be an entrepreneur all the more, learned how to better train entrepreneurs, and understood even more, in the European context, the challenges and opportunities of entrepreneurship.  My expectations were not met by this training.  Maybe I've been too well educated and focused on entrepreneurship here that nothing seemed new.  Some of the activities we did were things I've already done with my students in Causeni (creating a fake business, utilizing SWOT Analysis,  working through a marketing plan, testing individual creativity, etc.).  I was hoping to come away with some more concrete information and tips for training young entrepreneurs but received very little.   So that was the disappointment of the trip.  The upside? The people and the culture! The participants who were at the training course were from many different parts of Europe, and it's always interesting and educational to be around those from different countries.  I also participated in the training with another young woman, Cristina, from Chisinau.  We didn't know each other all too well before the trip, but I can say now after spending a few solid days together, we know each other quite well and for that I'm quite thankful.  She's the type of Moldovan that gives me hope and comfort when thinking about the future of this country.  She's smart, forward-thinking, realistic, and action-oriented. To add to that, she always could make me smile and laugh at ourselves and at the situations in which we found ourselves.  

Cristina and I with a delicious cheese cake and espresso.  

Participants in the training through the European Commission's Youth in Action Programme (Lithuania, Macedonia, The Netherlands, Romania, Bulgaria, Moldova, & Turkey were represented)

Croatian culture reminded me a bit of Italy.  People appear to be a bit lazy (but Croats swear they aren't) because they love meeting for a coffee or two (which could last 2-3+ hours- a Croat told me that's truly normal).  They love delicious big meals with lots of meat, generally speaking.  They are becoming more well-known for their wines, and they like to end their evenings with perhaps a beer or two or three.  Fine food and beverages- I can get behind that.  What was also surprising is the number of English speakers.  From older adults to youth, most every native I encountered spoke some English, if not quite well.  I also found the people to be very warm and open to tourists.

We spent all but one day in Zagreb, the capital city.  We took a day trip to Plitvice National Park, a natural forest flowing with waterfalls and lakes.  This gorgeous place  is a top spot for tourists in Croatia and with good reason.  It brought me back to the time when I lived in the Sawtooth Mountains of Idaho, only more tourists.  The waters were still and serene and flowing from one lake to another. 

What I also enjoyed about my stay was meeting people spontaneously and learning this and that about the Balkan's and beyond.  For example, I learned through our new couchsurfing friend that Kosovo seems to share similar characteristics of life in Moldova: people working abroad, remittances sent back home, poor infrastructure, high unemployment, etc.  I was reminded how war and politics, intertwined with religion, can damage lives, change culture, and have lasting impacts on future generations.  I was reminded also how people are just people, and at the end of the day, we all just want to be treated as humans with respect, love, and care.  That's a possibility that we can all attain if we all wish.  Traveling always leaves one pondering...

We happened to have a nice afternoon coffee and meal with two World Bank employees, covering payments for development projects in Northern Africa and the Middle East.  We met a nice gentleman on our first bus ride from the airport into the city.  On the last full day we were there, we recognized his face on the street and ended up sitting down for coffee and then Italian food (why not?).  As I have always had an interest in development work and specifically through international institutions like the World Bank, I found myself in a perfect place to ask some questions.  What I came to find out is that my hesitations to follow the development work trail may be a good thing for me.  Although they reassured me there should be a place for me at the World Bank (after I get a master's degree), they also assured me that the first month will be greusome and that it's not like a 9-5 job.  They work moreso 7am until 7pm with their heads left foggy at the end of every day.  I told them about the World Bank economist I met in Moldova once, who honestly and bravely laid out the truth:  "The majority of development work fails."  As romantically pleasing as the notion of development work sounds to any peace-loving, warm-hearted person, this quote is going to stick with me for a while.  (even as a PCV in a small town in Moldova.)  Returning to the time with our new acquaintances, the two gentlemen were so kind, smart, and light-hearted.  It was a refreshing afternoon, and I learned a thing or two about their countries of origin as well (Tunisia and Lebanon).

For lack of time/words, I will leave you with a couple photos from the enchanting Plitvice National Park and return soon to inform you of other happenings in May before I left for Croatia.  There were many (including a computer crash).

Plitvice National Park

Streams of living water...  I want to jump in!